Cynical Mom

Anonymous woman, if you're reading this, sorry for making fun of you.

When I was 16, I worked at Sportmart. One day when I was working the customer service desk, a woman brought in the rollerblades she’d purchased earlier in the day, saying that one of them was the wrong size and was hurting her foot.

She showed me how on the back of each rollerblade, it had a letter – one said R and one said L. “I need two Larges – I have one regular and one large”.

I gently explained to her that actually it stood for Right and Left, and they were in fact the same size.

Quote

"I just popped that one out to show you!"

Yes, this was said while my lovely four year old was pointing at the contents of the toilet, formerly the content of his bowels.

"It looks like a baloney-cheese roll!"

Children: a *de*-stressor, for once...

I've had a rough couple of days at work, and I've been curt and short-tempered with Jared lately and how slow he is to do just about everything I ask.

Twice today while he was lollygagging around and I got visually and verbally frustrated with him, Jared stopped and turned to me and said:

"Mommy, I'm adorable!"

Which promptly made me laugh. Then:

"See? I made you happy!"

I need to freeze that experience (plus this one) and remember it forever, so that I can pull it out when times get tough again.

OK I must admit that the hour of guitar hero I just played (Dude! I passed Jessica!... on "Easy". But still) was also helpful in relieving some stress.

From the mouth of babes...

"Mommy... when you say mean things to me, I want to say mean things to you back. You know that?"

Said from the top of the stairs during one of our nightly "negotiations" about how it's already bedtime and mommy and daddy aren't coming upstairs again and if you don't go inside your room and close your door we're going to come up and take your precious sippy cup of water away.

My god, what a brilliant kid...

Passions

If I had a million bajillion dollars, one thing I would love to do is quit my job and focus on growing my skills as a portrait photographer. I enjoy it so much, but all my knowledge is self-taught, trial-and-error and I would really benefit from some focused education and time to practice.

But at least I do have opportunities to play around with fun opportunities, such as my friend who is 37 weeks pregnant (displaying these here with her permission):

 

I really love my job, but a girl can dream. :-)

A sign that mommy's playing too much world of warcraft

My son and husband and I were at the park, in the playground area which is enclosed by a cement circle. He walks outside the cement circle, points at the grass a little ways way and says:

"Mommy, I'm going to go log off over there and get you a flower!"

We puzzled this one over for a minute, and then realized that he thinks that "to log off" means "to leave where you are and go somewhere else", because when we play WoW with him, we always make sure to "go log off there inside that inn" when we're done. Gotta get that rest bonus, natch.